Friday March 30th 2012

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Titanic, despite being largely perfect, possesses an ending so spectacularly moronic that it would seem out of place in all but the most saccharine of Nicholas Sparks adaptations. So imagine my surprise to discover that another, even shitter version exists (above) in which Old Rose somehow manages to convince Bill Paxton that they should throw away the $250 million diamond — the sale of which could save millions of lives around the world — because “only life is priceless”. Dick move, Rose, dick move.