The Blind Side

Monday March 22nd 2010


Ding Dong. Guess who’s finally seen all ten of last year’s supposed Best Pictures.

Me, that’s who.

The Blind Side follows ‘the extraordinary true story’ of Michael Oher, who went from living on the streets of Tennessee to becoming a professional NFL player, thanks to the support of his adoptive family. Bullock heads up the family, along with country singer Tim McGraw, a teenaged girl who says about three words in the entire movie, and – I know you’re not supposed to say anything but it’s eating me up inside – one of the ugliest kids I’ve seen in my life:

After a brief bit of expositional nonsense, it has a little go at tackling racial issues (fairly unsuccessfully) and then settles into more familiar ‘feel-good’ inspirational territory, complete with…

  • A teacher who sees potential where others see failure
  • A firm belief in the redemptive power of sport
  • The phrase ‘football scholarship’ used at least 3 times per minute

Bullock is certainly likable, but the fact that her performance (let alone the movie itself) is considered Oscar-worthy is ludicrous. Still, it’s by far the best thing in this bland, cliched, overlong and seriously predictable excuse for a film. Zing.

At least Avatar is no longer the worst of the Best Picture nominees.

Finally: