Exciting news for the six or seven people who live near Millbank

Friday February 25th 2011

A new cinema opens in London today and given that I live in London and spend most of my time in cinemas, I figured it was worth writing about. The Curzon Millbank is situated on the ground floor of Millbank Tower (where all the students had their fun a few months back) and contains one 280-seater cinema and one fully licensed ‘cafe-bar’.

They had an open day last weekend and we went along to case the joint.

First things first, they’ve got a Banksy in the foyer:

This is already feeling very authentic.

They’d also laid on plenty of free food and drink for the half dozen elderly people who showed up to have a look around, and we quickly set about consuming as much of it as possible before the staff’s glaring eyes became too much and we had to move on.

Saying that, we did get through a good three bowls of crisps. They just kept bringing more, with an efficiency that said ‘is this what you really want? DO YOU THINK YOU DESERVE MORE CRISPS? WELL FINE, HAVE THEM IF YOU THINK YOU’RE SO SPECIAL!!!!’ And we did.

We eventually started feeling a bit sick from all the salt so went in to look at the auditorium itself:

Here’s a quick review of the Curzon Millbank:

Cons: shit sightlines, no masking, distractingly bright walls.

Pros: fancy cup holders.

It’s a shame because I used to go to art school just down the road and know from experience that it’s an area largely devoid of cultural sites that aren’t the Tate Britain, but it’s hard to imagine students getting too excited about £10+ ticket prices and a programme of inoffensive family dramas.

I can’t however knock the bathroom facilities, which included these delightfully quirky urinals:

It’s a world gone mad!

The Curzon Millbank opens today and is showing West is West which might be awesome but looks a bit shit, doesn’t it? Upcoming films include Fair Game and The Red Shoes.